Thursday, November 22, 2007

The "FUCK!" Volume Scale

Throughout the course of our lives, certain events cause us to just yell "FUCK!" involuntarily. This scale is designed to give you an idea of how loud you scream "FUCK!" for each event.

40 decibels (Refrigerator Humming): Failing a test you studied 3 hours for.

55 decibels (Normal Talking Voice): Getting a piece of dust in your eye when no one is around.

70 decibels (Hair Dryer): Having absolutely no will to do homework and logging on to CollegeHumor only to find there are no new updates.

80 decibels (Subway): Getting killed in Halo 3 by a n00b.

90 decibels (Lawnmower): Having your team lose a game on a last second 3 pointer by the other team.

100 decibels (Snowmobile): Missing the last note of a perfected Guitar Hero song.

110 decibels (Jackhammer): Hearing stories of what you did while you were blacked out last night.

120 decibels (Chainsaw): Waking up from a sex dream with a hot girl and ensuing inability to fall back asleep.

140 decibels (Shotgun Firing): Looking in the mirror for the first time after a shaming.

215 decibels (Space Shuttle Launch): Waking up outside having no recollection of how you got there or what happened the night before.

248 decibels (Hiroshima A-Bomb) Your girlfriend telling you she is pregnant.

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